Family Favorites More Common Than Not

Parents with multiple children have always told them they loved each equally, but according to a recent Time Magazine article, this is not true.

In a study conducted by Catherine Conger, a professor of human and community developments at the University of California at Davis, a group of 384 pairs of siblings and their parents were observed and questioned about their relationships.

Conger came to the conclusion that 65% of mothers and 70% of fathers exhibited a preference for one child, typically the older one. Historically, the oldest in most families has been the tallest and strongest because, in their early years of life, they did not have to share food stores with other kids.

According to the article, parents tend to favor the biggest, healthiest offspring because those kids will be more reproductively successful. It is not just humans who feel this way. Creatures all throughout the animal kingdom try to maximize the potential of their biggest offspring.

A crested-penguin mother will kick the smaller of her two eggs out of the nest so she can focus on the chick she assumes is healthier in the bigger shell. A black-eagle mother will actually watch her bigger chick tear apart the smaller one.

A Norwegian study done in 2007 showed that there are some benefits to being the firstborn child. Firstborns have a three-point IQ advantage over later siblings, which could be a result of being the main focus of their parents’ attention in the earliest years of life.

Parents not only favor the oldest, they also have a soft spot for the youngest. Last-born children develop what sibling psychologists call a low-power strategy, which is the ability to disarm and charm.

“My little sister, Daniela, is the favorite because she is the youngest and gets whatever she wants,” said FAHS student Norma Zavala, who has five siblings.

Another powerful element in determining favoritism is gender. First- and last-born children always have a better shot at being the favorite than the middle kids do. Gender can be especially crucial in three-child families.

“My little brother Alex is probably the favorite because he is the baby of the family,” said Kendra Wert, the third of four kids. “However, my mom kind of favors me, too, because I’m her only daughter.”

Even though parents might favor one child more than the others, they still love each child for the individuals they are.