April Fools: No Ransom Yet for Fleetwood Camel

Posted on April 1, 2014 by

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On Sunday morning the 30 March, the famous Fleetwood camel residing next to Boyer’s Food Market was discovered missing from its enclosure.

Local residents are distraught over the disappearance of their beloved camel.

“We just want him to be returned safely,” senior Auston Clauss said.

Surveillance videos from the Boyer’s parking lot show a large trailer backed up to the entrance to the camel’s home. Two blurred figures can be seen leading the camel into the trailer.

Various theories have been circulating throughout Fleetwood. One is that this mischief is part of the yearly senior class prank. According to one unnamed source, the camel will turn up soon in an unknown location in Fleetwood.

Other theories blame Kutztown students for this backlack during an ongoing sports rivalry.

“Kutztown wants to make an impact against Fleetwood’s [track] team,” junior Nicole Reinert said.

If the camel is spotted, do not engage with the suspects. They should be easily recognized for having a thick veneer of camel saliva all over their persons.

The camel has a small white spot on the lower left ear, as well one white “sock” on its back right leg. For safety reasons, do not attempt to capture the animal on your own.  Never at any time should it be approached or handled.

Be on the look-out for missing clothing; cotton is a comfort for the feral animal.

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